<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>come on, skinny love, just last the year. by ahale</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27486313">come on, skinny love, just last the year.</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ahale/pseuds/ahale'>ahale</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Song Fics [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Criminal Minds (US TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Break Up, Falling Out of Love, M/M, Moreid, Sad, Sad Ending, Song fic, i was sad when i wrote this im sorry, losing friendship, skinny love by birdy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 20:54:05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>922</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27486313</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ahale/pseuds/ahale</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>They danced around the tension between them, holding on to what used to be. Maybe sometimes, even soulmates don't work out.</p><p>Based on Skinny Love by Bon Iver</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Derek Morgan/Spencer Reid</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Song Fics [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2008597</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>26</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>come on, skinny love, just last the year.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <strong>And in the morning I'll be with you, but it will be a different kind.</strong>
  </em>
</p><p>Even with an eidetic memory, Spencer can't pinpoint where it all went wrong. He tried his hardest, hoping that if he could figure out the when, it would lead to the how, and then he could finally figure out how to fix it. He denied the inevitable; his relationship with Derek was holding on by a thread.</p><p>They danced around the tension between them, holding on to what used to be. Maybe sometimes, even soulmates don't work out. It started off slowly, then it hit all at once. The pet names stopped, and Derek stopped calling Spencer "pretty boy." They stopped the random calls when they just needed to hear the other's voice after a bad case. Nights that used to be filled with cuddling at each other's places turned into sleeping alone, tossing and turning due to the empty space beside them. The sweet forehead kisses stopped, hugs never happened, and Derek even stopped running his hand through Spencer's hair after he had a nightmare. They both stopped putting in effort after they said "I love you" for the last time without even knowing it.</p><p>They started drifting, and they knew they were about to lose everything they worked so hard to get.</p><p>
  <em>
    <strong>And now all your love is wasted, then who the hell was I?</strong>
  </em>
</p><p> They were their normal selves at work, neither in an unspoken agreement to not alert the others of what they were feeling. Spencer held knew it was the only place he would get affection from his boyfriend so he held onto it as tight as he could and even started praying they get more and more work to do. The pet names went on, the sweet kisses came back, and the smiles on their faces whenever they saw each other returned, stopping as soon as they walked out of the BAU doors. They would part ways without a goodbye. No one ever questioned it, not even when they showed up separately as if they never showed up together at all.</p><p>Sometimes, after a particular bad case, Derek would climb into Spencers bed, holding him as if everything suddenly went back to normal. And sometimes, it would make Spencer's heart swell like it did when they first got together, but this time with a dash of false hope that maybe, just maybe, they're okay after all. And that's exactly what it was; a false sense of hope. When morning came, Derek was always gone. </p><p>They stopped communicating with each other. Spencer stopped telling Derek about how his mother was doing, and Derek stopped asking. The sex stopped being about intimacy before it stopped completely. Spencer never questioned when Derek got home a bit too late, the smell of alcohol taking over him completely. </p><p>Spencer didn't question the way Derek's phone would light up with an unsaved number, while Derek pretended Spencer didn't know.</p><p>
  <em>
    <strong>Come on, skinny love, what happened here?</strong>
  </em>
</p><p>The final blow came on chilly night in October at Spencer's apartment. Derek had came without letting Spencer know, walking through the door without a word. He stood there, staring at the ground, and it made Spencer nervous. </p><p>"You can sit, you know." Spencer whispered out, not moving to sit himself. He swallowed the lump in his throat, knowing he's about to face what he knew was the inevitable. </p><p>Derek stood there silently before looking at him, tears in his eyes. "This isn't working anymore, Spencer."</p><p>All it took were five words for his heart to shatter into a million pieces. Logically, he knew this conversation had to happen eventually. He just wishes he could've held on to what they used to have for a little bit longer. </p><p>"I know." He said, voice cracking as a few tears slipped out of his eyes.</p><p>"I'm breaking up with you," Derek said, tears falling as well. He didn't want to beat around the bush, and Spencer doesn't blame him.</p><p>"I know." He replied, not bothering to wipe his face. "We fell out of love, didn't we?"</p><p>Derek nodded, and just like that, the tension was replaced with grief. Grief for them personally, grief for all the memories they'd have to force themselves to forget. Grief for their relationship, and grief for the friendship they know has been ruined. </p><p>"Yeah." Derek whispered, more to himself. "Yeah, we did, kid."</p><p>Spencers heart ached at Derek calling him kid, knowing it would probably be the last. "Why couldn't we have held on for a little while longer? I don't want to lose you." Spencer cried.</p><p>"You know we couldn't have done this anymore." The words tased foul on Derek's tongue. "We gave up, long before we even realized." Derek walked closer to him, cupping the sides of his face with both hands to wipe the tears away. Spencer leaned into his touch, knowing he'll never get this again.</p><p>"I'm gonna miss you, Spencer." Derek leaned up, giving him a short kiss on the cheek that Spencer wished could last forever. Neither of them wanted to let go of what they had, but with one final smile towards Spencer, Derek left.</p><p>Spencer fell to the floor sobbing, heart aching as he's realizing he doesn't have Derek to catch him anymore. He pulled his knees up to his chest, sobbing in to his knees. There was now an empty space in his heart that would forever remind him of the day he said goodbye to his best friend. </p>
  </div></div>
</body>
</html>